First in the Family: How Neighbors Can Support First-Generation Graduates

May and June bring graduations across Boston and New England. For students who are the first in their families to finish high school, attend college or earn a degree, these milestones carry special meaning. They also come with a long list of unfamiliar tasks, from financial aid forms and housing deposits to job applications and graduation logistics.

First-generation students are often remarkably resourceful, but they may not have someone at home who has been through the process before. Neighbors, mentors, faith communities and community groups can fill some of those gaps with encouragement, information and practical help.

Understanding the Challenge

Being first in the family is a source of pride, but it can also be isolating. Families may be deeply supportive while still unfamiliar with how colleges, financial aid or professional job searches work. Students may be balancing school with paid work, caring for siblings or translating for parents.

Common pressure points include:

• Understanding financial aid offers and comparing costs
• Meeting deadlines for deposits, housing and orientation
• Finding summer jobs to save for school expenses
• Buying supplies, clothing for interviews or items for a dorm
• Knowing what questions to ask and whom to ask
• Feeling like they do not belong in new academic or professional settings

Ways Neighbors and Mentors Can Help

You do not need to be an expert to help. Often the most valuable support is simply being a calm, knowledgeable adult who can say, “Let’s figure this out together.”

• Share your experience: If you went to college or started a career, explain what surprised you and what you wish you had known.
• Review documents together: Help a student read a financial aid offer, housing contract or job description, while encouraging them to bring questions to the school’s official offices.
• Practice interviews: Run through common questions for jobs or scholarship interviews.
• Proofread: Review essays, cover letters and emails to professors or employers.
• Offer rides: Help with transportation to orientation, campus visits or job interviews.
• Celebrate: Attend a graduation party, send a card or simply tell the student you are proud of them.

Helping With Financial Aid Questions

Financial aid can be confusing even for experienced families. Mentors can help students understand the basic vocabulary and know where to go for answers, without giving formal financial advice.

1. Encourage the student to list every offer side by side, separating grants and scholarships (which do not need to be repaid) from loans (which do).
2. Help them calculate the remaining cost after grants and scholarships.
3. Remind them to read the terms of any loan carefully.
4. Encourage them to contact the college’s financial aid office with questions; asking is normal and expected.
5. Point them toward free, official resources rather than paid services that promise special access.

Supporting Families, Too

Parents and guardians of first-generation graduates are often proud and eager to help, even if the process is new. Treat them as partners.

• Offer to explain terms in plain language, and ask if translation would help.
• Encourage students to share key dates and information with their families.
• Respect family decisions about distance, cost and timing.
• Acknowledge the sacrifices families have made to reach this moment.

Practical Gifts That Help

If you want to give a graduation gift, practical items are often more useful than decorations. Consider:

• A gift card for a bookstore, office supply store or grocery
• A sturdy backpack or laptop bag
• Bedding, towels or a shower caddy for a student moving into housing
• A professional outfit or shoes for interviews
• A transit pass for commuting to a summer job
• A note with your contact information and an open offer to help

Addressing the Feeling of Not Belonging

Many first-generation students worry that they are not prepared or do not belong. Mentors can help by sharing honest stories of their own uncertainty and reminding students that asking for help is a strength. Encourage students to connect with campus resources early, such as advising centers, tutoring, student organizations and programs specifically for first-generation students, which many colleges offer.

Staying in Touch Over the Summer

The summer between high school and college can be a time when plans quietly fall apart. Missed emails, unexpected costs or family pressures can lead students to delay or abandon enrollment. A mentor who checks in once or twice over the summer can help a student stay on track.

• Ask whether they have completed orientation, housing and payment steps.
• Check that they know whom to contact if something goes wrong.
• Offer encouragement if they are feeling nervous.

For High School Graduates Heading to Work

Not every graduate is heading to college, and every path deserves respect. Students starting jobs, apprenticeships, trade programs or military service also benefit from mentors who can help with résumés, interview skills, workplace expectations and budgeting basics.

Help With Graduation Day Itself

Ceremonies have their own logistics that can trip up families doing it for the first time. A mentor can help a student confirm cap-and-gown pickup, ticket limits for guests, arrival times, parking or transit options and accessibility needs for relatives. Offering to photograph the family, save seats or drive a grandparent can make the day calmer. Small details like these let everyone focus on the moment itself.

A Mentor’s Checklist

• Offer a specific kind of help: rides, proofreading, practice interviews
• Help organize deadlines in a simple calendar
• Encourage questions to official school offices
• Include families as partners
• Give practical gifts if you want to give something
• Check in during the summer
• Celebrate the achievement loudly and sincerely

Being first is a huge accomplishment. With a few caring adults nearby, it does not have to be a lonely one.