National Grandparents Day is observed on the first Sunday after Labor Day. It is a chance to celebrate the love, wisdom and support grandparents bring to families. For many households, grandparents are more than occasional visitors. They are the primary caregivers, raising grandchildren full time because parents are unable to do so for any number of reasons.
These families, sometimes called grandfamilies or kinship families, exist in every community across Boston and New England. Grandparents raising grandchildren often step in suddenly, sometimes with little preparation, while managing their own health, finances and retirement plans. This Grandparents Day, here is how neighbors and community members can offer practical, respectful support.
Understanding Kinship Families
Kinship care means a child is being raised by a relative or close family friend instead of a parent. Grandparents are the most common kinship caregivers, but aunts, uncles, older siblings and family friends also take on this role. Arrangements can be informal or involve legal guardianship or custody.
Reasons vary and are often private. A parent may be ill, deployed, incarcerated, struggling with addiction or deceased. Whatever the reason, respect the family’s privacy. Neighbors do not need to know the story to offer kindness.
Common Challenges Grandparents Face
- Energy and health: Keeping up with young children or teenagers can be physically demanding.
- Finances: Many grandparents are on fixed incomes and did not plan for the costs of raising children again.
- Navigating systems: Schools, pediatricians and benefit programs may have changed a lot since they last raised kids.
- Technology: School apps, online portals and digital forms can be confusing.
- Isolation: Friends their own age may be retired and traveling, while parents of their grandchildren’s classmates are often decades younger.
- Emotional strain: Grandparents may be grieving the circumstances that led to the arrangement while also caring for children who are grieving too.
Practical Ways Neighbors Can Help
- Offer rides. School pickups, practices and appointments add up. Offering to carpool even once a week can be a big relief.
- Share meals. A casserole or a standing invitation to a weekly family dinner can ease the load.
- Provide occasional childcare. A few hours of babysitting lets a grandparent rest, run errands or attend their own medical appointments.
- Help with technology. Offer to help set up school apps, email accounts or online forms, patiently and without judgment.
- Include them. Invite grandparents and kids to block parties, playdates and neighborhood events.
- Pass along kids’ items. Outgrown clothing, books, outdoor gear and toys are often welcome, but ask first.
- Help with yard work or snow shoveling. Physical chores can be hard for older caregivers.
How to Offer Help Gracefully
Many grandparents are proud and independent and may hesitate to accept help. Specific offers work better than general ones.
Instead of “Let me know if you need anything,” try: “I drive my kids to the school every morning. Would it help if I picked up your granddaughter on Tuesdays and Thursdays?”
Other tips:
- Respect their parenting decisions, even if they differ from yours.
- Do not ask about the parents or the circumstances unless they bring it up.
- Follow through on what you offer. Reliability builds trust.
- Accept a no without pressure, and keep the door open.
Supporting the Grandchildren
Children in kinship families may be coping with loss, change and uncertainty. Neighbors can help by being steady, caring adults in their lives.
- Include them in neighborhood games and activities.
- Be mindful around holidays like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, which can be hard.
- Avoid asking children why they live with their grandparents.
- Celebrate their achievements, from a good report card to a school performance.
How Schools and Community Groups Can Help
- Use inclusive language. Say “families” or “caregivers” instead of “moms and dads” in school communications.
- Offer flexible meeting times for parent-teacher conferences.
- Create support groups where grandparents raising grandchildren can meet each other.
- Host workshops on topics such as school technology, adolescent development or benefits navigation.
- Share resource lists in large print and multiple languages.
Finding Resources
Grandparents raising grandchildren may be eligible for various kinds of support. These local resources can help families find out what is available:
- Mass 211, which connects residents with local services
- Local councils on aging and senior centers
- School counselors and family liaisons
- Public libraries, which often host family programs and can help locate information
- Legal aid organizations or family law clinics, which can explain guardianship and custody options
If you are helping a neighbor look for resources, offer to sit with them while they make calls or fill out forms.
Celebrating Grandparents Day Together
Grandparents Day is a perfect occasion to honor kinship caregivers in your community. Ideas include:
- Helping grandchildren make cards or small gifts for their grandparents
- Hosting a neighborhood breakfast or picnic in honor of grandparents
- Asking grandparents to share a story or skill with neighborhood kids
- Simply saying thank you: “I see how much you do for your grandkids. They’re lucky to have you.”
A Community That Shows Up
No one should have to raise children alone, at any age. When neighbors share rides, meals and encouragement, grandparents raising grandchildren get something they deeply need: a community that has their back. That support benefits not just one family, but the whole street.
Quick check: What is usually the most helpful way to offer support to a grandparent raising grandchildren?
- Ask detailed questions about why the parents are not involved
- Make a specific, practical offer, such as a regular school pickup
- Give advice on how they should parent
Show answer
B. Specific, reliable offers of help are easier to accept and respect the family’s privacy and independence.
